Become a Fascinating Communicator

Our daily conversations can often feel rehearsed and impersonal. We ask a generic question, we get a generic answer, and neither party feels like anything substantial has come out of the interaction. With any conversation-whether with a close friend or a total stranger-we get out what we put in. By changing the way that we approach such interactions, you can set yourself up for fascinating exchanges that will lead to more stimulating discussion and closer personal relationships.



Fascinating Conversations Are Just a Question Away
Think about recent conversations you have had with colleagues, clients, family and friends. Now think about conversations you have had with customer service people in shops and restaurants, your Uber driver, or with a stranger waiting in line or on public transit. Did these conversations cover more or less the same general topics, such as the weather? More importantly, did the conversation fizzle out after the exchange of generic pleasantries? 

It seems that nearly every conversation, regardless of who we are talking to, begins with some variation of “Hi. How are you?”. While this is perfectly fine, there is only so much longevity a conversation can have that starts with this same basic opening. It is not surprising that our answers are often just as boring and rehearsed.   

The key to having more substantial conversations is to put the other person in the spotlight by asking meaningful questions. When you make the conversation about the other person, they immediately become more engaged and will give you more thoughtful responses. 

Breaking away from the basic questions of “What do you do?” or “Where are you from?” is not difficult. However, it is important to be genuine. Ask questions that you are truly curious about and you will be rewarded with fascinating conversation! The other person will pick up on your interest and respond in kind, but not if they get the impression that you are zoning out or do not legitimately care about their response. 

So the next time you are talking to a friend, family member or colleague, try using some of these questions and see the change in the quality of the conversation. 

What is something that you are most grateful for?
What has been the highlight of your day, week or month?
What are you reading right now?
What has been the most defining moment of your life so far?
If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? 

Once you see how making the conversation about the other person can shift the tone of the interaction for both of you, you will never need to resort to small talk again. Furthermore, you will likely find that your relationships become stronger and more personal. Fascinating conversations are only a question away!
Gary Vice is sought out by leaders in Software and Services who recognize the need to attract the industry’s best talent.  Through Strategic Recruiting Partners’ extensive network of relationships, they are able to identify high level opportunities for well qualified candidates.  To discover how this process can benefit your job search, simply reply to this email or call Gary at 469.402.4008.